5 Pointers For Single Women

I had a young gal come up to me the other day and ask me if I had any advice for her, when looking for a guy. Many women struggle with what to look for before they get into a relationship. The common misconception by men and women alike is that they believe that once they fall into love (e.g. true love) they will live happily ever after. I am not saying that I believe in "true love," but if true love has any substance then it is only found in Jesus Christ. Therefore, all my answers will be Christ-centered, because everlasting intimacy is only found in Jesus Christ. If salvation is in no one else, then there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we might fall into true love. 

True happiness is not found in any other man, besides Jesus Christ. Therein, my answers will be focused and allotted to Christ and him alone. If in Christ the full assurance of humanity is secure to eternities future, then the full assurance of his love is ever applicable in our daily lives, moreover in our relationships. Lastly, without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to Love must believe that he exist and that he rewards those who seek him (Heb. 11:6).

Advice for single women:
1. Never date a man you would not want your sons to aspire to be like.
2. Never pursue a man, he must ALWAYS pursue you first. 
3. Be modest. Show him you respect yourself, otherwise he will not respect you.
4. Be whole. No one should ever date someone who is not content being alone.
5. Do not settle.

Never date a man you would not want your sons to aspire to be like. Ladies choose men that are going to raise godly, honorable, young men. Men that respect women and who love God. Ladies only date a man that treats you the way you want your daughters to be treated like. If he is abusive, he will be abusive to your daughters to. If he is not gentle with you, he will not be gentle to your daughters. Your daughters will turn around and pursue men that are just like their father, because he is the spiritual head of the household. Women date men that are like their fathers. If daughter's fathers are pour fathers, then men will take advantage of your daughters. Also, date men that will teach your sons and daughters the gospel.

Never pursue a man, he must ALWAYS pursue you first. Ladies you want to date and marry a man that is always going to pursue you. You want a man that is in love with you. You want a man that proves he will always pursue, provide, and protect you and your family. You also want a man that not only will pursue you romantically, but holistically. After all Jesus is the man who pursues us, like wise men pursue your brides. Jesus' bride understands the value in Jesus as a man pursuing them for relationship. Why should we, men pursue our brides any different than Jesus?

Men that continue to pursue women holistically are Jesus men. "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her" (Eph. 5:25).  Men that understand this love their wives holistically, even to death. Jesus men are men that provide, work hard, are gentle, honorable to their wives, role models to their sons, and reflections of what kind of man their daughters should marry. 

Be modest. Show him you respect yourself, otherwise he will never respect you. Ladies dress to be reflections of the women you want your sons to marry. Ladies, you are the most influential women to your sons of the kind of women that they ought to pursue. Be women of valor, strong, unshakeable, prudent,  wise women that understand they are daughters of Christ. Call men to be men. This begins by not dating boys that can shave, but men that can be men. 

Be whole. No one should ever date someone who is not content being alone. Ladies before you can get into a relationship you must be complete on your own, you must be content to be content with Christ alone. If Christ is not enough for you in your singleness, your husband will not be enough for you in your marriage. Hearts that are not captivated and completely in love with Jesus are in no way capable of becoming whole without him. Two sinners married does not produce fulfillment, but more sin. Likewise, two cups half full does not produce two whole cups. That is a prime reason why so many marriages end up in divorce, because the cups are not full. Jesus is the only one who can fill the cups and cause them to overflow. No one should ever marry someone who has only half a cup.  

Do not settle. Ladies it is better to be alone, than to be with a man that tears down your home. Too gals settle for mediocrity. Ladies do not settle for a man that promises, "you can have it all," but does not have it all. Do not be foolish. Their promises are like chaff that the wind drives away, but a man who delights in the Word of truth is like a man who leads his family well. Ladies it is better for you to live on the corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a destructive man (Prov. 25:24).